getting old and forgetful

I just found a Christmas CD in my car. Not in the glove box, or in the console. No... it was in my CD player. Slot #6.  Now, I spend more than 2 hours a day in my car travelling back and forth to work. My biggest question isn't why I still have a Christmas CD in my car in June. My question is why I didn't notice it until today!

passwords

Thanks a lot Apple iTunes!
You made me change my password today. Which I did. Only, you wouldn't accept any of my usual passwords. Apparently, a real word (no matter how vague it is) isn't allowed. I had to make up a word. A word that you won't find in any dictionary. And then I had to add a bunch of numbers and characters to it as well. It was the only way you would allow me to save my new password. So now, not only will others never be able to guess what my password is, I will never remember it either. Unless I write it down somewhere. And just how secure is that?

Senior's moment

I got a cheque in the mail today. A refund from our house insurance company. It was for (get this) a "maturity discount"! Basically it's a discount because both of us are over 50 now. OMG! My first "Senior's" discount! Aaaack... I feel so old!

Mail?

When was the last time you mailed a letter? I actually sent something off in the mail today. For the first time in a very long time. In fact, I used the last stamp in the house, and have no intentions of buying any more until I actually need them. It's amazing how things have changed and how much of our lives are now internet or computer based.

The aftermath

I've spent the last few days in a whirlwind.
I worked until 6:00pm on Wed night. Quickly came home to pack, and get ready for my 8:00am flight the next day. I was much more unorganized this time than I usually am. On Thurs morning, I flew to Calgary. We got dumped into a meeting with auditors within minutes of getting to the Calgary office. Then spent an hour getting a tour of the office, and meeting lots and lots of people. Then lunch. Then a 2 hour meeting about budgets and other stuff. Then we drove off to Edmonton. It took us just over 3 hours to get there. Checked into the hotel. Then went out for a late dinner. By the time I got to bed, it was midnight!
Got up at 6:00am. Checked out of the hotel. Had breakfast. Did a whirlwind tour of two facilities in Edmonton. Went out for lunch. Another tour of another facility. A quick drive to the airport. And finally, on my way home.
But, when I got home, I literally crashed for two days! We spent most of Saturday lying in bed, and when we finally did get up, we mostly laid around watching FIFA World Cup games on TV, and playing on the internet.
Today, I'm feeling somewhat human again. But am still amazed at how a small 2 day trip can wipe me out so much!

Too old for this

I'm getting old.
The thought occurred to me the other day when I realized that I don't bounce back so easily after an injury or illness. In fact, I've been on and off the wellness bandwagon for close to 3 months now. Without going into all the gory details of my problems, here is a recap...
In December I had a tooth abscess. One of the most painful experiences of my life.
2 rounds of antibiotics, and some heavy duty painkillers. This from someone who hates to take an aspirin for a headache.
Christmas time, and the antibiotics are finished, but then the plumbing issues started. And I don't mean kitchen plumbing. It's all from the pills.
Kick in a bit if hormonal problems at this time too, just to mix things up a bit.
This goes on for 6 weeks, and I finally decide to go to my doctor.
A few tests, and I end up going on another round of antibiotics.
Then, I have a bad reaction to the pills.
I stop taking the pills, and lie on the couch waiting for the symptoms to stop. This takes 2 days. I wonder what on earth could go wrong next.
I shouldn't have said that.
2 days later, and I'm at work, and my back goes out. Bad. Like it did about 3 years ago.
Stupid me decides to try a different chiropractor when I can't get a hold of mine. Big mistake!
Today, I managed to see MY chiropractor, and got my back put right. But my back muscles are so tense and messed up, I still can't walk.
I've spent more time popping pills, and lying on my couch in the last 3 months than I care to admit to. And I'm tired of it.
Really, this isn't meant to be a "feel sorry for me" blog post. On the contrary. I simply wanted to put this out there so the Universe would know.... Enough already! I'm ready to be healthy. I'm ready to be happy again. I don't want to be the drugged up, frowny person I have been lately.
Ok Universe? You got that? Go pick on someone else for a while, k? I'm getting too old for this shit.

Happy Halloween

I was surfing the internet trying to find some great Halloween pictures that I could post today. Instead, I found a picture of 2 comic book covers. Now... I actually had these two comic books growing up.

 

When I saw them online, I gasped, and was suddenly transported back a few decades ago. My thoughts turned to a littler version of me, sitting in the back of the blue suburban, driving down the highway with the trailer in tow. Mom and Dad in the front. Sister and little brother on the seat beside me. The cat hanging out on the back of the front bench seat in the truck. And me, sitting there, reading comic books. We had a selection of them, and these were just 2 of them that I remember. I used to take my favourites with me whenever we travelled, so I think I read each one more than a zillion times! Yeah! That was travel before Nintendo DS's, DVDs, iPods, cell phones, and other portable electronic devices!
Happy Halloween everyone!

Can't see a damn thing

Driving to work this morning. Tired. Had a really long day yesterday, and couldn't shut the brain off when I went to bed last night. So, I drove in this morning feeling tired, and cranky.
Almost to work, and I saw a small car in front of me. The little label on the back of the car said "FURBUT". I blinked, and shook my head. Did I see that right??? FURBUT??
That must be wrong. There is no car called FURBUT. This must be a joke or something.
I drove a little faster, to catch up to the white car.
At the next stop light, I got my chance to really see what was on the back of the car...

I think I need new contacts.
Either that, or more sleep!!!

I think I'm getting old...

The CP Rail strike that is on now, negatively affects our business. As it does with a lot of businesses across the country. So, I've been watching the news, listening to talk radio, and asking questions at work to try and understand the issues and the process. Tonight, I find myself watching CPAC on TV to watch our MPs vote on the bill.

Then it dawned on me. I'm watching CPAC??

Now, you have to understand that I'm not a very political person. I vote. And try to understand the bigger issues. But, that's about it. I don't get involved in political debates, nor really talk about political issues. I equate political discussions with something that my parents and grandparents used to do. So, me, watching CPAC??! I must be getting old!

reminders of time gone by...

Do you know what this is?

If you do, you'll remember them.
If you don't, I can tell you that it is film canister. You know... film for cameras. It used to come in these little plastic canisters. And I used to keep a ton of them (because I used to take a lot of pictures). That's right... before digital cameras, you actually had to put film in your camera. And, when you took a picture, you had to use up the whole roll of film, and then take it in to get developed, then wait to pick it up, and then (and only then) could you see the picture that you took. Remember that? If you were broke (like I was), you usually had to wait a week for your pictures to get developed. No 24 hour "while you wait" photo developing for me... I couldn't afford it. And if you bought the 48 picture exposure film instead of the 12 (like I used to because it was cheaper again), well, then you had to wait sometimes a whole month before you finished the roll and got the pictures back! You simply didn't take 48 pictures a day/week like you do now. You didn't want to waste the film!!

My how things have changed!
With digital photography, you not only see the picture the minute you take it... but you also take a whole lot more pictures. You can. It's doesn't cost anything to take 22 pictures of the same rainbow. So you do. At least I do. But, sometimes... just sometimes... I miss the anticipation of going to pick up my pictures from the local drug store. The exclamations of "oh, I remember that!" or "Wow, that picture really turned out good!". But, I certainly don't miss the cost!

Oh... and those little canisters? GREAT for taking vitamins or aspirin in your purse. Or keeping jewellery in when you were traveling. I still have a few left over from the olden days, and I think I might just hang on to them.

Time to go?

A's Auntie "K" passed away yesterday. It was very unexpected, and very sudden. And, as we deal with the loss, I have to wonder...

What is easier to deal with? A sudden death, or knowing that you are going to die?
Take in point, my Grandma. She was diagnosed in March with terminal lung cancer. We know her end is coming, we just don't know when. But, it is easier for us relatives to 'deal' with it. I know she's leaving soon, so I've made an effort to spend time with her, ask her the questions I need to ask, and tell her I love her. I will be sad when she goes, but I'm sure I will be at peace with it. She, however, is having a hard time facing her own mortality. I saw the same apprehension and fear in my girlfriend, when she passed away from cancer about 9 years ago.

On the other hand, Auntie's death yesterday was quick and sudden. There was no time to say things, or spend time with her. You had to take what you had given. And while it is difficult for us relatives to deal with (shock, possible regrets), I have to think that she didn't go through what my Grandma is going through.

This has me thinking that it's probably better to go quickly.
It also has me thinking that life is too short, and that I had better get to my bucket list while I still can!

Dear Shaun Cassidy

Dear Shaun Cassidy
I heard you are going to be on Oprah today! I simply cannot wait! I was totally and completly in love with you when I was a teenager. Or didn’t you get my fan letter? No worries, it was a long time ago. And it’s not like I wrote a ton of letters to you or anything. I wasn’t one of those obsessive fans that wrote you every week. No, I just wrote one letter, and mailed it. Or did I? Cripes Shaun, it was a long time ago. I barely remember…

But, I do still remember that silly butterfly feeling I got when I saw a picture of you. I bought every copy of Teen Beat Magazine that had a picture of you in it, and methodically cut out each picture and pasted them into my Shaun Cassidy scrapbook. Yes, Shaun, I loved you that much, that you had your very own scrapbook!

I had your album, and still remember your songs…. “Da Doo Ron Ron”…. “Do you believe in Magic?”… YES! I believe in Magic! I even took the album cover to my hair dresser once, and told her to cut my hair just like yours! In hindsight, that wasn't such a great idea.

And, I think I watched every episode of the Hardy Boys ever broadcast! Although, my memory would be hard pressed to recite even one line from any episode now-a-days.

But *sigh*, you never wrote me back, or maybe I never mailed the letter to begin with, and you never called, and never even acted like you knew I existed. So, I moved on with my life. I’m now a grown woman with a mortgage, my own car, a totally different hairstyle, and a husband. Yes, Shaun, I had to move on! I could not wait forever for you to fall into my life and sweep me off of my feet. But, I do wonder what you have been up to the last 30 some odd years. And I’m curious to see how “old” you are now. So, I’ll skip out of work early today, and go watch Oprah, because I’m dying to see you again. Just one more time, for old time’s sake!

After that, you’ll have to excuse me while I go try to explain to my husband why I have a scrapbook dedicated to a guy I never met, and I can’t seem to find the time to finish a scrapbook of my wedding!

Fall!

Welcome to Fall!

This is my favourite time of year. I love the cooler crisp days, especially when the sun is shining. I love the colours! I love watching the leaves change.

And, best of all, I get to use my favourite mug, from Starbucks, that I got for my birthday last year.

Though it is amazing how fast time flies. I was talking to a friend of mine yesterday, who said something like "...at the end of the month, next week..." I stopped for a second, and realized that September is OVER at the end of next week. Then we are into October. What? Didn't September just start?? Where did the time go? And why does time seem to go so much faster the older you get?

can't remember a thing!

Do you ever do this? Have you ever picked up a book, and said to yourself, "I really want to read this!" and then about 1/2 way through Chapter One, you say to yourself, "I think I've read this before!" Well, it happened to me recently. But, I have a real problem with it...

You see, I read a lot. And I don't usually keep the books I've read. I lend them out, and they never get returned. Or I give them away to charity or sell them at garage sales. As a result, there are a lot of books that I've read, that I don't really remember that I've read. I thought I could keep all the books I read, but that concept did not fall into the "keeping my house clutter free and organized" category. So, about 6 years ago, I started keeping a list of the books I've read. Now, some of you might think that odd. Keep a list of books that you've read?? But, it is so "me"! It falls right into the I-love-list-making, I-can't remember-a-thing, OCD-type personality that I have. So, it was the perfect option for me. Now...I only keep the books that I think are really good, that I want to read again, or that 'spoke' to me on some level.

So, let's go back to my first paragraph again. I picked up a Nicholas Sparks book called "True Believer". It's an older one of his novels, and I honestly thought that I hadn't read it.

But, part way through Chapter One, I thought that it sounded very familiar. I remember the character, and the premise of the story. Into Chapter Two, and now the story is really sounding familiar. Crap...he's visiting the same diner he visited before. And the characters are all named the same. Have I read this before? I check my list. Nope. It's not there. Well, then, I must have read it before I started keeping my list. I check the copyright date in the book. 2005. I started keeping my list in 2004. So, that doesn't make sense. It's not on my list, so I haven't read it since it's been published, so why does it seem so familiar????

I couldn't figure it out. Maybe I started to read it, and (for whatever reason) put it down and never finished it? My list only contains the books I've finished reading, so that could be the reason. Either that, or I'm simply going insane.

Then I took a trip to Nicholas Sparks website. It was there that I learned that True Believer is the Prequel to another book "At First Sight". And low-and-behold....I HAVE read "At First Sight". So, now it all makes sense!!! No wonder the characters and the town were so familiar! But, I can tell you....for a few days there, I thought my brain was really messed up!

PS...

PS
Happy 40th Birthday to my little brother!!

Man...I thought when I turned 40 I felt old. But, that's nothing to the feeling you get when your little brother turns 40!

ID???? Are you joking?

I got ID'd today. Yup! Asked for ID. At my age!?

It wasn't in a bar (that would just be insane). It was buying cigarettes for Hubby. Something I DON'T normally do. No, really, I don't. There is something about actually physically buying the things that somehow is an indication to others that I condone it. And I don't. I am an ex-smoker, and I am completely and totally the typical ex-smoker. Loud and very vocal about how the things will kill you. But, that's another post for another time.

Today, when I went to the counter and asked for the ones in the gold package (because I seriously don't know what they call them anymore…you can’t say “light” because they aren’t “light”….they are called Mild or Tame or some sort of made up word) Anyways, she asked me for ID.
I chuckled (out loud), and said, "Wow! My husband is going to laugh when he hears this one!"
She said, "Well, we are supposed to ID anyone who looks to be around 30".
Now she didn't say I looked 30. She said "around 30". Which probably means 3 or 5 years older than 30....at least that's what I'm thinking.
Then, I smiled. A big smile.
I'm turning 45 in 2 months.
I haven't considered myself "around 30" for 10 or 12 years now.
I hate to admit it, but she kind of made my day!

Eyes

Remember at the beginning of the year, I ordered multi-focal contact lenses? I wrote about it here...
Well, it turns out that they might be causing me migraines. I never really had migraines before. But, the last few months I've have a few really really bad ones. And they last for days. The latest bought of headaches started for me on Friday night. I've been fighting it off ever since, but yesterday it hit me hard. So, hard that I went against my stand on medication, and actually took a Motrin. (Sorry liver....but head was just hurting too bad!)
Anyways, I've been trying to find out why I suffer from headaches now. I'm not as stressed as I used to be. I'm eating better. My neck and shoulders are not out...I just went to the chiropractor. Anyways, I think I may have finally figured it out. Something that hubby said yesterday. I was complaining about my headache and how upset my stomach was because of it. I said to him, "How come you never get headaches?" That's when he said that he used to get them all the time until he got his prescription changed in his glasses. Then it dawned on me. I've been wearing multi-focal lenses for 8 months now. And the optometrist did say that the right eye was being used more for close up, while the left eye is used more for far away. And I was working on the computer close up for most of yesterday morning.
Yesterday, it was so hot that I unplugged the laptop and worked at the kitchen table by the open window for awhile. It meant that I had to stare at a little tiny computer screen, and I wasn't wearing my reading glasses. I was using the bi-focal contact lenses to see. Well, with the contact lenses, my right eye actually works harder than my left eye. The optometrist said that I was left eye dominant, and with these lenses the right eye was being used more for close up, while the left eye is used more for far away. And I was working on the computer close up for most of yesterday morning. And that is where the headache was. It felt like someone put a poker through my right eye into the back of my brain. So, could it be? Could it be that my right eye had to focus harder than the left eye, and that's what made my headache so bad?
Today, I've decided to go back to my old contact lenses for awhile to see if it makes any difference. At least until I can get in to see the optometrist. Part of me hopes it does make a difference, so I don't get headaches any more. But, part of me is already missing the multi-focal lenses. I can't see! I didn't realize how bad my close up vision was! No wonder I went to the eye-guy in the first place!

Recap

- Happy Belated Mother's Day to all Mother's out there. We spent the day with my mother-in-law first, then my Grandma, then my Mom. I brought my camera with me, but promptly forgot about it, and didn't even get any pictures!

- The Canuck's lost last night to the Chicago Blackhawks. We are officially out of the Stanley Cup Playoffs now. waaaaaa!

- It was my 2 year blogging anniversay on Sunday, and I completely forgot about it!

- My back has been sore since Saturday. I don't know what I did to it, but it got so bad yesterday, I had to go to the chiropractor again. It's feeling a bit better today, but still hurts. I'm thinking of trading in my body for a younger model. Can they do that yet?

friends from long ago

I got an email from my brother yesterday. An old high school friend of mine found him on Facebook, and asked him to put her in touch with me. He sent me her email address and contact info. Wow! I haven't seen this woman for 25 years, and here she is wanting to hear from me again. I sat down to compose an email to her. But what do you say?
"How the heck are you? It's been so long!"
After that, my mind went blank.
I'm not on Facebook. I have never really wanted to join, and never really saw the appeal of it at all. I know what it's like, because I have friends and co-workers who are on Facebook. But I have never felt the need to join myself. I'm a very private person. That's why my first name is not on my blog, and I always refer to people by their first initial on my blog, and not their names. There is already too much information floating around cyber-space. I don't want to add to the mess. Besides, I have enough problems keeping in contact with the friends I know I have...never mind the friends I can't remember I know. :-)
Anyways, I finally compiled something to say, and sent her an email. It will be interesting to see where this goes. We were best friends in elementary school, and into high school. Until she moved away around grade 10 or so (I can't really remember). I know our lives have most likely gone in 2 different directions, so I'm curious to see if we have anything in common anymore. Although, I have a tendancy to think that we don't have anything in common. I've changed a lot in 25 years. I'm sure she has too. I'm just not sure we've gone through the same changes.

yes ma'am!

I went to the lottery store to check my numbers. "Sorry, Ma'am. Not a winner."
Then to the video store to return some movies, when a man walked in front of me. "Oops. Sorry Ma'am. Excuse me, please".
Then to Safeway, where they had 10kg bags of sugar on sale. Looking at the bag, contemplating on how to pick it up (bad back and all), when the young stockboy looks at me and says, "I'll help you with that Ma'am. Did you just want the one bag?"
Standing in line at the Safeway waiting to pay, when the guy behind me asks me, "Excuse me, Ma'am, do you know what time it is?"
At Future Shop looking for a particular video, I stop to ask the sales guy where that video is hiding. "It's over here, Ma'am. Would you like that on DVD or Blu-Ray?" "Blu-Ray", I say, "And please! Don't call me Ma'am." "Yes, Ma'am", he replies, and then smiles.

I don't know. Maybe I should be thankful that everyone was so polite and nice to me. But, I haven't been called Ma'am that many times in one day as I was yesterday. I can't help but feel old!!